A Man's Point of View
Le point de vue des hommes

.                                             It is important for men to remember that as women grow older
it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping
they did when they  were younger.
When men notice this, they should try not to yell.
.
            Let me relate how I handle the situation.
When I chucked my job and took early  retirement a year ago,
it became necessary for Nancy to get a full-time job both
                 for extra income and for health insurance benefits that we need.
She was a  trained lab tech when we met thirty some years ago
and was fortunate to land a  job
at the local medical center as a phlebotomist.
.
                         It was shortly after she started working at this job that
I noticed she was  beginning to show her age.
I usually get home from fishing or hunting
about the same time she gets home from work.
Although she knows how hungry I am,
she almost always says that she has to rest
for half an hour or so before she starts supper.
.
         I try not to yell at her when this happens.
Instead, I tell her to take her time.
                 I understand that she is not as young as she used to be.
I just tell her to wake me  when
she finally does get supper on the table.
.
           She used to wash and dry the dishes
as soon as we finished eating.
It is now not unusual for them to sit on the table
for several hours after supper.
I do what I can by reminding her several times
each evening that they aren't cleaning themselves.
I know she appreciates this, as it does seem to help her
get them  done before she goes to bed.
.
              Our washer and dryer are in the basement.
When she was younger, Nancy used  to be able to go up
and down the stairs all day and not get tired.
Now that she is  older she seems to get tired so much more quickly.
Sometimes she says she just can't make another trip down those steps.
I don't make a big issue of this.
As  long as she finishes up the laundry the next evening
I am willing to overlook it.
                         Not only that, but unless I need something ironed to wear
to the Monday's lodge  meeting or to Wednesday's or Saturday's poker club
or to Tuesday's or Thursday's bowling or something like that,
I will tell her to wait until the next  evening to do the ironing.
This gives her a little more time to do some of those
                         odds and ends like shampooing the dog, vacuuming, or dusting.
.
     Also, if I have had a really good day fishing,
this allows her to gut and scale the  fish at a more leisurely pace.
.
            Nancy is starting to complain a little occasionally.
Not often, mind you, but just  enough for me to notice.
.
                         For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to find time
to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour.
In spite of her complaining, I continue to try to offer  encouragement.
I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days.
That way she won't have to rush so much.
I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then
wouldn't hurt her any, if you know what I mean.
.
      When doing simple jobs she seems to think she needs
more rest periods than she used to have to take.
A couple of weeks ago she said she had to take a  break
when she was only half finished mowing the yard.
I overlook comments  like these because I realize it's just age talking.
.
 In fact, I try to not embarrass her when
she needs these little extra rest breaks.
I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly
squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while.
I tell her that as long as she is making one for herself,
she may as  well make one for me and take her break
by the hammock so she can talk with  me until I fall asleep.
.
                         I could go on and on, but I think you know where I'm coming from.
I know that I probably look like a saint
in the way I support Nancy on a daily basis.
I'm not saying that the ability to show this much consideration is easy.
Many men will find it difficult.
Some will find it impossible.
No one knows better than I do how  frustrating
women can become as they get older.
.
My purpose in writing this is simply to
suggest that you make the effort.
I realize that achieving the exemplary level of showing consideration
I have attained is out of reach for the average man.
However guys, even if you just yell at your wife a
little less often because of this article,
I will consider that writing it was  worthwhile.
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