Some discipline approaches are used so often that parent assume they must work. But many common ways of handling discipline can actually encourage poor behavior. Here are discipline "don'ts" to remember:

• Don't ignore misbehavior, this tells your child that what he is doing is OK
• Don't encourage misbehavior by saying things like I would like to see you try it".
• Don't focus on apologies. Sometimes parents simply tell kids " say you are sorry" when they misbehave. But kids also need to be told their behavior is not OK
• Don't leave room for error. Instead of telling a child " try to finish your chores today" parents need to be clear: "Finish your chores today"
• Don't ask pointless questions. "How many times have I told you not to do that?" Instead, focus on what you'd like your child to do: "stop yelling now"
• Don't use threats. Saying, "if you don't finish your homework before dinner, you can't have dessert" gives your child a choice. It's better to say "please do your homework before dinner"
• Don't be vague. Kids don't learn from phrases like " Grow up". They need specifics
• Don't encourage secrecy. Saying to a child "don't let me catch you doing that" tell him instead that the behavior is OK - as long as he does not get caught.